My heart

Can I tell you something that means so much to me?

Last night, M was playing around in bed with hubs and I. It was bedtime, so I said to M, "Okay, say good night. Let's go to the crib." So hubs and M said good night to each other.

Then M came over to me, as she does every night when she doesn't fall asleep with us first, so we could go to her crib. I carry her to her crib every night. I like to get any extra hugs and kisses in for the day, ya know?

If M is awake when I take her to her crib, I'll rock her for a few minutes. I try to savor each moment. I'm sappy, I know.

M always lays her head on my shoulder when I take her to her room and rock her. But just for a change, I held M as I did when she was a newborn. You know, across your chest, with the babies head in one crook of your arm, the legs in the other.

And, to my surprise, M let me hold her like that. But let me point out, there is a liiiiiiiiitle bit of a difference between an 8 lb newborn and a 25 lb toddler.

Anyway. So I rocked M like she was a newborn. And this momma ate.it.up.

M's eyes were wide open when I started. Within a few minutes, that little girl was sound asleep.

In my arms.

As if she was a newborn.

I continued rocking her after she fell asleep. Just standing in the middle of her room, she and I. A mommy and her squishy newborn toddler.

Just me looking at G-d's work, in my arms!, wondering how I got so lucky to be a Mom. To be M's mom.

And earlier in the day yesterday? As M was laying in my arms during her afternoon nap, I leaned over to kiss her cheek. She was sound asleep, her paci hanging out of her mouth.

As I moved my face away after I kissed her, she opened her eyes ever so slightly, turned her face to me, smiled a big ol' smile, laid her head back down, closed her eyes, and went back to sleep.

My heart truly overflows with love and gratitude for this child.

And, if yesterday is any indication, 2012 is going to be a year of loving moments and happy memories.