Failure. It hurts.

I had this whole elaborate plan in my head of how my 10 mile run would go.

I'd do it, be so happy I did, see the look in hubs' face of pride, see M's smiling face as I got closer and closer...

Then we'd go to subway again and I'd stuff my face with yummy goodness.

But, G-d had other plans for me.

At mile 1, my shins started hurting me as bad as the previous run when I suddenly collapsed from knee pain.

At mile 3.25, I HAD to sit down. (which I've never had to do before) I had this bright idea to try a few more miles.

HA!

HAHAHAAHAHAAAAAAAA.

HAHAAHAAA.

I got .25 down the road and fell down, yet again, from the pain.

I was keeled over, grabbing my knee.

Something is wrong with my knee.

Obviously.

I was going back and forth a million times over, on if I should write this post. I mean, who wants to read about someone failing? I sure don't.

Because, the past two days? I've felt like a failure. But, I married my best friend and, he happened to know just what to say. Every single thing he said was what I needed to hear. Not wanted to hear, per se, but needed.

The Husband reminded me that finishing my run on Sunday is not as important as finishing the half-marathon run.

And that coming up shorter on miles is okay. Because I'm taking care of myself now so that I can do longer runs later.

And, despite me feeling like a failure because I physically could not meet my running goal for the first time since I started training, I'm not in fact a failure. Because, failure is never trying.

And I've certainly tried.

I know that I could have done the 10 miles. That's double digits! I wasn't nervous AT ALL! I was so excited!!!

But, my body wouldn't let me. I in fact, could not do 10 miles.

And that made me feel like a failure. And made me sad. But The Husband cheered my soul up with his words.

Then someone retweeted Joel Osteen on twitter Monday morning:

God would not have put that dream in your heart if He had not already given you everything you need to fulfill it.

And so, I made an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon for this week. He'll hopefully tell me I'll be able to run my first half marathon in 18 days.

Because, with G-d on my side, I'll be alright.